Wednesday, December 2, 2020

12/2/2020

Oh Mom, I’m having a hard moment. I’ve held so much inside, trying to be strong for all that’s on my plate, trying to stay focused. Tonight I had a good healthy moment to my self. I had to let so much pain and heartbreak out. I miss you so much, I just want to hug you, I want to hold you, I want a hug from you. I held my pillow so tightly imagining it was you. I imagined you holding me back so tightly. I’m so sorry for what we both had to endure. I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to protect you. I’m so sorry I was all alone. I tried so hard to protect you. I thank God I got to be at your side those 7 days! I know your in Heaven, I now know Heaven is for real. I thank God for this, this brings me some comfort. I promise I will let it out more often, so it doesn’t build up. 

I pray so deeply that this blog stays up forever and nothing happens to it. After we’ve all passed, for your grandkids and theirs.

You were and are so deeply loved!! More then you ever knew on earth and that breaks my heart too. But I find comfort knowing you now finally know and that your watching over all of us and you get to be with us all at once and always🥺💔🙏🏼😇

Sunday, November 1, 2020

11 years..

 https://youtu.be/zCvgXw-Bh04

11 years later- I can now think of you often with basic thoughts-but that’s it! And I thank God repeatedly for how far I’ve come. I still have to check the invasive-intrusive-memories and details that occasionally try and sneak in-which debilitate my heart. 


I miss you and love you with every breath I take, every heartbeat💝💝💝 Heart&Soul, Together Forever; Earth & in Heaven😇

Your Sunshine, Your PT, Your Tall Person, Your Pootie Tootie, Your AJ

11 Years






Mommy, here we go with another year. 11 years to be exact💔... We’ve come so far from that brutal day🙏🏼. I thank the Lord continuously for OUR survival from the tragic 7 days😇. You moved mountains for your children..You touched so many people...You inspired so many more...and You never truly knew how special & amazing you were...So humble, kind, compassionate, passionate, modest... I could I go❣️ You always were and will be OUR light.... OUR shining star🌟 

You taught me how to be the most amazing mom, (which includes mistakes and growth along the way). This is the greatest gift you have given me. My pride and joy, my every breath and beat; just like it was yours💕 You taught me how to love unconditionally...💓

You are my hero❣️

Xmas was everything to YOU and our family and we carry on that torch. 

Today- instead of this date being so tragic; we will begin a new tradition of Xmas decorating on the 1st of every November. With the spirit of YOU💖


Monday, September 28, 2020

Happy Birthday Mommy



 I miss you with every breath I take❣️ I know your spirit is with us and knowing Heaven is For Real- gives me comfort❣️